Ingredients for a Host Club
by NiftyPaint24
Summary: *Drabbles* Multiple genres, ratings, parings, etc. All will be 300 words or less. Written for FanFic bakeoff on LJ.
1. Cleaning Up

Title: Cleaning Up

Fandom: Ouran High School Host Club

Author: Niftypaint24

Prompt: Fanfic_Bakeoff Secret Ingredient #2: Tangle

Word Count: 152

Rating: T

Summary: [CU] Just another everyday occurrence. [Haruhi, Hikaru, Kaoru]

Warnings: Typical Hikaru/Kaoru behavior

**CLEANING UP**

Haruhi turned when she heard the sound of dishes clattering to the floor. It didn't take her long to figure out the situation. Hikaru was poised above a broken tea set, warm tea staining the lush carpet. Kaoru gasped and grabbed his brother, pulling him to his feet and hugging him close. Limbs tangled around one another with a practiced ease that only they could perform. Endearing words were mutter just loud enough that the girls seated around them could hear. It was all a performance, and the girls _loved _it. They cooed and swooned at the twins, at Kaoru's concern for Hikaru's well-being, their devotion to one another.

With a sigh, Haruhi changed directions so that she could grab some towels to clean up the mess. It was the same as everyday, only this time it was broken bits of porcelain and a puddle of tea she would be cleaning up.


	2. New!

Title: New!

Fandom: Ouran High School Host Club

Author: Niftypaint24

Prompt: Fanfic_Bakeoff Secret Ingredient #3: Yielding

Word Count: 222

Rating: G

Summary: [CU] A new scheme for higher income. [Haruhi, Kyoya]

Warnings: None

**NEW!**

Haruhi loosened her tie and unbuttoned her jacket. She had had a long day catering to the whims of the Host Club and its guests and now it was finally time to go home. As she started towards the door she noticed Kyoya sitting at a table, typing away on his lap top. If it had been anyone else the sight wouldn't have made her think twice, but since it was Kyoya, it meant that he was probably working on some scheme that involved something she wouldn't enjoy. She casually made her way to him and glanced over his shoulder at the lap top's screen. The Host Club's web page filled the little screen and a flashing 'new products' icon caught her eye.

"We have new products?" She asked hesitantly.

"Yes," Kyoya answered continuing to type. "The new photo books finally arrived."

"_New_ photo books?"

"They're the highest yielding product for the club. Yours is the second highest selling, after the twins of course."

Haruhi groaned and Kyoya turned in his chair so that he could see her better.

"Ten percent of every sell is taken off of your debt."

"Only ten?" She asked.

Kyoya smirked and turned around once more. "Of course if you prefer, I could take yours off the site."

"No," Haruhi sighed. "Ten percent is better then nothing."


	3. Commoner's Fare

Title: Commoner's Fare

Fandom: Ouran High School Host Club

Author: Niftypaint24

Prompt: Fanfic_Bakeoff Secret Ingredient #5: Token

Word Count: 209

Rating: G

Summary: [CU] Haruhi's school bag is full of wondrous things. [Haruhi, Tamaki, Honey]

Warnings: None

**COMMONER'S FARE**

"Shoot," Haruhi sighed as she bent to pick up her bag.

Unfortunately it had been knocked over during the afternoon while she performed her host club duties and now her things were scattered on the floor. Even the change had spilled from her coin purse somehow.

"Oh no, do you need help Haruhi-chan?" Honey asked as he knelt and began helping by picking up her books.

"Thanks Honey-sempai," Haruhi smiled.

"Are those what I think they are?" Tamaki gasped as he dropped to his knees beside her, swiping up all of the coins before she could grab them. "I've only heard of them."

"What are they?" Honey asked peering into Tamaki's hands.

"If I'm right, they're the fare that commoners use to buy their seat on the trains," Tamaki said in wonderment as he picked up one of the small tokens between his thumb and forefinger.

"Give me those before you lose them," Haruhi snipped, snatching them out of his hands.

"Ooooo," Honey grinned. "Can you buy cakes with them Haruhi-chan?"

Haruhi couldn't help but smile, "No, you can only use them to ride the train."

"We should all take a trip and ride these trains, the way commoners do," Tamaki said seriously.

Haruhi sighed while Honey nodded enthusiastically.


	4. All Apart of the Job

Title: All Apart of the Job

Fandom: Ouran High School Host Club

Author: Niftypaint24

Prompt: Fanfic_Bakeoff Secret Ingredient #5: Token

Word Count: 260

Rating: T

Summary: [CU] Haruhi questions Tamaki's tactics. [Haruhi, Tamaki]

Warnings: None

**ALL APART OF THE JOB**

"Please accept this rose, which pales in comparison to your beauty my princess, as a token of my affection for you," Tamaki said in his voice that was solely reserved for moments such as these...entertaining guests of the host club.

The girl he was presenting the rose to had the typical reaction, she swooned and 'squeed', taking the rose from him as if it was her most treasured possession. Haruhi, who was standing behind the couch Tamaki and his guest were currently sitting on, did her best to stifle a laugh. The scene proved to be too comical however and she attempted to muffle her laugh with the palm of her hand. Tamaki heard, with what could only be described as his super-sonic hearing, and craned his neck around so far to look at her that she thought for sure he would cause himself pain with the action. He turned back to the girl and took her hand in his.

"Excuse me for a moment my princess," he said before kissing the back of her hand. He was at Haruhi's side in less then a second. "What's so funny?"

"Don't you think you're laying it on a little thick?" Haruhi asked with a laugh.

Tamaki frowned, "Every one of our guests comes here to feel special. It's our duty as hosts to see that their every wish is met."

Haruhi glanced at the girl on the couch, who was still in a dither over the rose she held, and rolled her eyes, "Then I guess you're doing your job well."


	5. Tastes Like Happiness

Title: Tastes Like Happiness

Fandom: Ouran High School Host Club

Author: Niftypaint24

Prompt: Fanfic_Bakeoff Secret Ingredient 6: Shine/Bonus Ingredient: Dreamfic

Word Count: 220

Rating: G

Summary: [CU] It's a dream come true. [Honey, Haruhi]

Warnings: May cause cavities

**TASTES LIKE HAPPINESS**

It was the most amazing spread of sugary treats Honey had ever seen. It was too good to be true! Table upon table stood before him, piled high with mouth watering goodness in the form of cakes of all different sizes. A thick piece of strawberry cake layered with chocolate called to him from a shiny gold plate just a few feet away. He hesitantly approached the table it sat on, glancing around for Mori, who would no doubt stop him from eating all the cake he desired. But Mori didn't appear, didn't stop him, and a smile pulled at Honey's lips. He picked up a conveniently placed fork and held his breath in anticipation as he cut away a bite-sized portion of the strawberry cake. His eye closed as he ate his first bite, the cake's succulent flavor exploding in his mouth.

"Taste's like _happiness_," he said in awe before reaching for his next piece.

Haruhi hesitated as she walked past the plush couch Honey was taking his afternoon nap on. _Had Honey-sempai just said something? _She wondered. Honey shifted in his sleep and mumbled something else that sounded like, "There's so many to choose from." Haruhi smiled and shook her head before continuing on her way. Honey-sempai was probably having one of his never-ending cake buffet dreams again.


	6. Hazardous Work

Title: Hazardous Work

Fandom: Ouran High School Host Club

Author: Niftypaint24

Prompt: Fanfic_Bakeoff Secret Ingredient 6: Shine

Word Count: 289

Rating: G

Summary: [CU] Commoner's coffee attacks! [Haruhi, Tamaki, Hikaru, Kaoru]

Warnings: None

**HAZARDOUS WORK**

Haruhi worked diligently to prepare enough instant coffee for the Host Club's guests that afternoon. In her haste she attempted to grab the tiny bowl of sugar cubes as she was pouring the hot water into one of the one-of-a-kind tea cups. She managed to nudge the cup with the arm holding the sugar cubes, knocking it off of the table, sending it careening towards the tile floor. Before she could gasp, she reached out to try and grab the cup, scalding herself with its contents as they spilled out. She hissed in pain, snatching her hand away, failing to catch the cup and it shattered on the floor at her feet. The chatter in the room died and it seemed as if the sound of the cup breaking echoed throughout the room. Tamaki practically took out his guest as he leaped over the couch to run to her side.

"_Haruhi_, are you-" he was cut off when the twins appeared out of nowhere, elbowing him in the stomach. "Ooof!"

"Are you alright Haruhi?" Hikaru asked.

"I burned my hand," she explained, moving to clean up the mess the broken tea cup had made.

"Let someone _else _do that," Kaoru said, gripping her right arm as Hikaru gripped her left.

"But-" Hikaru began, looking over her shoulder at the mess as the twins guided her towards a couch.

"Who knew making commoner's coffee could be such hazardous work?" Kaoru smiled.

Tamaki glanced at the three of them sitting on the couch, then the broken cup, shining in a pool of coffee. _Should _he _clean this up? _He wondered. He knelt down, and pondered at how best to handle the situation, having no idea what would be the proper method.


	7. There's A Hole In My Ocean

Title: There's a Hole In My Ocean

Fandom: Ouran High School Host Club

Author: Niftypaint24

Prompt: Fanfic_Bakeoff Secret Ingredient #8: Surprise/Bonus: Emo

Word Count: 289

Rating: G

Summary: [CU] Summary [Tamaki, Haruhi, Honey]

Warnings: None

**THERE'S A HOLE IN MY OCEAN**

"What did you say to Tamaki-sama?" Honey asked tugging at Haruhi's jacket.

Haruhi glanced over her shoulder at the short statured third year. "Uh, nothing?"

Honey tilted his head towards the corner of the room, directing Haruhi's eyes in that direction. Tamaki crouched in the corner, his arms wrapped around his knees, his head hung low. He was obviously having one of his brooding fits. Haruhi sighing to herself.

'_Surprise, surprise,' _she thought as she made her way towards Tamaki despite the fact that she would rather not. _'I wonder what it is this time.'_

"Tamaki-sama?" Haruhi asked softly, hoping this would be painless. Tamaki's head slowly swiveled until he was looking up at her. "What's wrong?"

"You don't like the gift I gave you," Tamaki stated as though it pained him to even speak of it.

"You gave me a gift?" Haruhi said without thinking. Tamaki's eyes grew wide and filled with tears. "O…oh," she stammered. "_That _gift. You're wrong, I really do like it."

"You do?" Tamaki asked, his face lifting slightly.

"Yes," Haruhi answered with a smile as she wracked her brain to think of what Tamaki had given her.

"So you'll use it?"

"Of…course," Haruhi said hesitantly.

Tamaki snapped out of his funk immediately. "Kyoya said you wouldn't use it because it was ugly."

Then it clicked. He was talking about the hideous pencil pouch he had given her that morning. Haruhi forced a smile to her face. "I don't think it's ugly," she lied.

Tamaki's face lit up. "Good," he said before leaving to see to the guests he had been neglecting, leaving Haruhi to dread the fact that she would now have to use the pencil pouch covered in cartoon fancy tuna rolls.


	8. Punch the Bunny

Title: Punch the Bunny

Fandom: Ouran High School Host Club

Author: Niftypaint24

Prompt: Fanfic_Bakeoff Secret Ingredient #9: Extreme

Word Count: 297

Rating: G

Summary: [CU] Haruhi's not on board with Tamaki's latest idea. [Haruhi, Tamaki, Honey, Mori, Kyoya]

Warnings: It's a little OOC

**PUNCH THE BUNNY**

"Ugh!" Haruhi growled as she shoved open the double doors.

Honey instantly slipped behind Mori's legs as Haruhi continued on her way past them. Haruhi looked extremely angry and it was _scary_.

"Haruhi wait!" Tamaki cried, rushing through the door behind her. "You didn't even look-"

"No," Haruhi called over her shoulder. "I'm not wearing it."

"Would you at least give it a chance?" Tamaki pleaded.

"No," Haruhi stood her ground on the matter.

"Please just look at it. It's really cute!"

Haruhi turned around to face Tamaki, stopping him in his tracks with the angry look she gave him. After a split second of paralysis, Tamaki held up the bright pink bunny costume he was attempting to convince Haruhi to wear the following day. Haruhi narrowed her eyes and picked up a glass of punch that was left over from the Host Club's activities for the day. Then she smiled, which Tamaki found even more frightening then when she had been staring him down with a look of anger. She casually walked towards Tamaki and stopped half a pace from him.

"No, I will not wear your stupid bunny costume," she said slowly before she dumped the contents of the glass she held onto the costume.

Tamaki, utterly defeated, sank to the floor, holding his ruined costume close.

Kyoya cleared his throat, gaining everyone's attention. "If you would like your earnings for the week to count towards your debt…" he trailed off, his eyes locking with Haruhi's.

With a defeated groan, Haruhi ripped the stained costume from Tamaki's hands and turned her back on him, stomping towards the door.

"Drop that at the cleaners will you," Kyoya said with a tiny smirk.

Haruhi glared at him over her shoulder.

"See you tomorrow Haruhi-chan," Honey offered timidly.


	9. Pump Up the Marmalade

Title: Pump Up the Marmalade

Fandom: Ouran High School Host Club

Author: Niftypaint24

Prompt: Fanfic_bakeoff Secret Ingredient 10: Detail + Bonus: Cake

Word Count: 189

Rating: G

Summary: [CU] Even small decisions are complicated. [Haruhi, Hikaru, Kaoru]

Warnings: None

**PUMP UP THE MARMALADE**

All of the details for Honey-sempai's surprise birthday party were just about complete. The special china had been ordered, the streamers bought, the invitations sent out to select guests; absolutely everything but the final, and most important piece…his one-of-a-kind birthday cake.

"It should be strawberry cake with white and blue butter-cream icing," Hikaru insisted.

"With fresh strawberries covering it and 'Happy Birthday Honey-sempai' written in purple icing," Kaoru added.

"Is it really _that _important what the cake looks like?" Haruhi asked them. "He's going to have it completely eaten in a matter of minutes. Its detailed design is the last thing he's going to think about."

Both Hikaru and Kaoru looked at her as if she had grown another head. "Of course it matters," Kaoru began.

"It's Honey-sempai's birthday; a _very _important event," Hikaru continued.

"Everything _has _to be perfect, including the cake," they finished together.

Haruhi took in the serious looks on their faces, something she rarely saw. "Alright," she relented. "You're right. It should be perfect."

The twins grinned with satisfaction and returned to browsing through the glossy cake catalog placed on Haruhi's lap between them.


	10. Remedies for a Solved Problem

Title: Remedies for a Solved Problem

Fandom: Ouran High School Host Club

Author: Niftypaint24

Prompt: Fanfic_bakeoff Secret Ingredient 10: Detail

Word Count: 149

Rating: G

Summary: [CU] It'll all according to plan. [Kyoya, Tamaki]

Warnings: None

**REMEDIES FOR A SOLVED PROBLEM**

No detail, no matter how large or small, was left to chance in _his _host club. Everything was thought through carefully; each tiny detail meticulously gone over. Oh yes, he knew what was going to happen _long _before anyone else did. Kyoya was happy with his position within the host club. He was the one who _truly _ran things, he just let everyone else _think _they had a hand in it. Especially Tamaki. Heaven knows Kyoya's life was much easier letting him think he was in charge. Kyoya would politely listen to Tamaki's ideas and twist his words around into something that would suit the host club better, leading the fool to believe that Kyoya's idea was his all along. Tamaki might have been the face of the host club, or its so-called King, but Kyoya was the one who stood content in his shadow, running everything in secret.


	11. Designated Baker

Title: Designated Baker

Fandom: Ouran High School Host Club

Author: Niftypaint24

Prompt: Fanfic_bakeoff Secret Ingredient 10: Detail + Bonus: Cake

Word Count: 297

Rating: G

Summary: [CU] Tamaki's help can hardly be called that. [Haruhi, Tamaki]

Warnings: None

**DESIGNATED BAKER**

Haruhi heaved a long, weary sigh. This had been such a horrible idea, something which she had been fully aware of when entering this endeavor; but there was just no way she could stick with her original ruling on the matter when Tamaki ran into a corner and pouted like a poor beaten puppy. So she had relented and agreed that he could help her and look where it had gotten her. The kitchen, as well as everything within it, was covered in a fine dusting of flour, broken eggs coated the counter top, the bottle of vegetable oil was leaking onto the floor, sugar was scattered across the counter, and just about every dish or utensil she owned was dirty and piled high in her tiny sink. All details she foresaw, all things she could have avoided by simply telling him no and sticking with it.

Tamaki smiled at her, covered in more ingredients then her kitchen. He was so proud of himself and she couldn't help but laugh at how ridiculous he looked in the frilly pink apron he had insisted on wearing throughout the process.

"When will it be finished baking?" he asked happily.

"In about an hour," Haruhi answered.

"And when do we get to eat it?"

"After it's had time to cool and we've decorated it." Tamaki's eyes lit up with the prospect of decorating the cake that was currently baking in the oven. "But we have to clean up this mess first."

"Right," Tamaki said clapping his hands together.

Haruhi grabbed a dish rag and handed it to him. Tamaki had wanted to be involved with every detail of baking a cake, and she was sure as heck going to make sure that he was involved with cleaning up his mess.


	12. Don't Be a Drag, Just Be a Queen

Title: Don't Be a Drag, Just Be a Queen

Fandom: Ouran High School Host Club

Author: Niftypaint24

Prompt: Foolish (Fanfic_bakeoff Secret Ingredient #18)

Word Count: 167

Rating: G

Summary: [CU] Best intentions = Hilarious results [Haruhi, Tamaki, Kyoya, Honey, Mori, Kaoru, Hikaru]

Warnings: Cross-dressing, Spoilers for episode 9

**DON'T BE A DRAG, JUST BE A QUEEN**

Haruhi blinked, her mouth slightly agape. She couldn't believe what she was seeing. She _had _to be dreaming. Every host club member, save Mori, stood before adorning over-the-top dresses. Even Kyoya was dressed in a completely outlandish concoction of ruffles, lace, and bows. They all wore full makeup, even down to fake eyelashes and far to much blush. They all looked foolish, but Tamaki took the cake. He lounged on a settee with showgirl-style feathers sprouting from his headband, the silliest come-hither look on his face. The twins winked at her, faces coyly hidden behind their paper fans, and Haruhi lost it.

"You-" she gasped, laughing so hard that tears filled her eyes. "Look ridiculous!"

"Aww, I think we look pretty," Honey pouted.

"We went to a lot of trouble to get done up for you," Kaoru complained.

"The least you could do is compliment us on what pretty ladies we make," Hikaru finished.

Haruhi shook her head, clutching her stomach as she, impossibly, laughed even harder.


End file.
